iM KNOWN SWEETHEART AS YOU KNOW i HURT A FEW FEEliNGz
AS PROMiSED WiTH THE SOON TO BE ClASSiC VANz POST AHAHAH
AND THE NOW iMFAMOUS MARK'z WORlD MY THOUGHTz AND HiS THOUGHTz
BUT i WAS THiNkiN' YOU KNOW WHATz CRAZY HOW COUlD i GiT MARK'z SiDE AND NOT MY JAZZMiN'z SiDE YA KNOW iTz ONlY RiGHT THiS iS THE lAST iM GONNA BE DEAliN' WiTH THiS PROBlEM SO WHATEVER i POST iS FiNAl i DONT WANT NO HOES HOllAiN' BOUT OH COUlD YOU ADD i HAVE SOME WORDz FOR MARK TO WHATEVER BiTCH THiS JAZZMiN'z TiME TO SHiNE OHHH i ZANDRA'z SiDE TO i MiGHT lEAK THAT TOO AFTER i GiVE JAZZMiN THE PROPER HYPE THEREz ONlY ONE TOPiC TODAY OBViOUSlY
- JAZZMiN'z SiDE OF THiS WHOlE MAURY/CHilCE BULLSHit ass SHOW THAT HAS BABY DADDY DRAMA THAT WE All WATCH AND lAUGH AND WHEN THE BlACC GUY COMES ON YOU lAUGH HARDER CUZ HE REMiNDS YOU OF BERNARD OR SOME BlACC PERSON YOU KNOW HAHAHAA
HOW COUlD THiS?
i like the way he kisses me slowly. it gives me butterflies. and i like it when he makes those little baby farting sounds on my stomach x] i like it when he puts all my hair back behind the pillow when i fall asleep, and i like it when he holds my hand when i fall asleep. i like it when he kisses my nose and makes me laugh. i like it when he stares in my eyes face to face and starts to smile. i like those cute text messages that wake me up saying goodmorning babe, how was your sleep? i love you<3. he makes me smile even when im half awake! i like it when he sings to me over the phone, and i like it when he says baby, i la la la la love you! and i start laughing and he tells me im too cute.i like it how he knows how to make me smile when im mad at him. i just have to give up and laugh cause i know hes got my weak spot ;] i like it when he tickles me when i start to fall asleep, and i like it how he tells me hes not ticklish, but yet i seem to find the spots that he is. i like when he starts to mock me even tho sometimes it gets annoying lol. and i like it when he tells me im too cute and i say really? and hes like DUH<3 which makes me smile, like im sopose to know im cute lol. and i like it when he tells me im beautiful :] i like it when he says babe, and i say mmm. and he says mmm. lol. i like it how i can try something different in my look and he tells me he cant wait to see me and he knows im gonna look beautiful :] i like it when i tell him my stomach hurts and he starts to rub it :] i like it when he holds me tight in his arms!<3
i just wanna say that with you mark, im living my dream. you complete me in every way. im really happy your my wonderful boyfriend. i love you with all my heart, you mean everything to me and i dont ever wanna lose you no matter what.
TURN iNTO THiS
me and mark had it all. it was all cool then he desided to cheat on me. it was basiclly 100 people on 1. and i wasnt just going to believe mark. yeah fucked up on my part. he said many times he didnt do anything with holly but then i forgave him and the truth was said. i was blind by my feelings and everything. we started new and had it good.
we had people trying to break us apart but i wasnt with it. like lauren, "hating" me for going out with mark. soposibly giving me dirty looks everytime we kissed. i wasnt trying to do it on purpose but i wasnt about to share mark.
so i let that slide. then zandra, we broke loose. almost actually fighting for this boy. STUPID.
then we just reolized that we shouldnt let mark keep us from being friends, so we made up and moved on.
i remember those days just laying down with mark when he would say lauren and zandra are both ugly and your the only one for me. of course i believed it but not anymore.
me and mark would always argue for the stuppidest stuff. always about other people. always going to other people for help and not to each other.
telling the whole world about our problems and talkin shit behind each others back. we both said we were gettting tierd of it and that we should just break up.
i know it was the best for us and him. "i knew he wasnt sopost to be sad or mad or feeling anything else but happy.. thats my job right? as a girlfriend.."
not to bring anymore problems to what he already has. so in the end he was just treating me like i was his sister or a friend. calling me names and what not. i mean i cried and he didnt want me to cry with him or infront of him.
so i just hid all my feelings when i was with him and as soon as i got picked up from his house i would cry. and one day i was crying and i told him i would call him back because i didnt want him to hear my cry..
and he said no i understand how it feels and everything and i just said no. everything just went downhill from there.
i would always cry everynight. i was stupid for it but i couldnt hide my feelings inside forever. [thinking back to all the times weve had.]
he just basicly treated me like shit from there on out.i remember when i once "slapped him" but it wasnt full out drama type shit and it wasnt hard and i just said i would slap you again because we were argueing and he said if you hit me again, "ill hit you in the face".
and yeah i got scared after to talk to him, to even look at him and i still remember it till this day. and i would always get those feelings he would be using me and stuff. just to get the goods then when i leave he would be talking to someone else.
i would hate to bring it up and ask because i knew what would happen. then i just thought about it all one night. what if i just treat him like i want to be treated maybe he'll realize how nice im being and treat me the same.
so i tried that. it didnt work and people told me i was stupid for doing it but i honeslty didnt want us to end.
6 months ive put in. my longest and happiest relationship, i wasnt about to let it go. then i would just hate to talk to him at night knowing im going to cry and have to wake up with this ugly face!
i would always make up excuses like im tierd and busy or whatever but then i would hate it because then we would turn around and say i never have time for him which wasnt true.
"then it came to a stop, i realized we had nothing.." no trust, no love, and no friendship. so i just said its over. inside i know i was stupid but what if he just cheated on me in highschool when im not with him,
he cheated on me in middle school and i was there! so thats what was running through my mind. and yes i know i have a thing for a 10th grader. but IT ALL CHANGES WHEN YOU HAVE TRUST FOR SOMEONE AND IF YOU DONT.
ya know? so i just let him be, stopped talking and texting. i went over once and we just had it like old times, laying down watching tv. and he said i miss these times, and i just got that rush of butterflies in my stomach and i said me too,
even tho i know it wouldnt happen again. and i was right. it only got worse. i just let everything be and next thing i know hes all up on laurens nuts and im just here laughing.
im not trying to break the peace and what not. ive made my choice, and im just going to leave them alone. all i ever wanted was for him to be happy with, or without me... i guess now we'll never know!
WOW! BUT THiS iS NOT iT i HAVE MORE YES WHY YOU THiNK i MADE YOU WAiT A DAY NOW i GOT SOME EXClUSiVE MARK FOOTAGE OR WHATEVER THiS HERE iS CRAZY BUT THATz FOR ANOTHER POST ill THROW iT iN WiTH THE ZANDRA iT HURTz TO SEE SUCH A RElATiONSHiP END i MEAN REAl SHiT OUT OF All THE RElATiONSHiPz i AlWAYz THOUGHT MAN ME AND EDiTH WOUlD NEVER END JAZZMiN AND MARK WOUlD NEVER END AND ROBERT AND ZEKENlA i PROBABlY SPEllED iT WRONG BUT FUCC iT i NEED TO GiT SHiT DONE NO DiSRESPECT iM JUST BUSY i MEAN iT HURTz CUZ WE THOUGHT WE DiDNT HAVE PUPPY lOVE BUT iN THE END THATz All iT WAS..................................................
-FADE ME OUT